My note to American Spectator about public nudity in San Francisco

This morning I read a very good article on how liberals go bonkers for ever more strange government rules and regulations. Here is is:

And I can agree with most of it, I really can. Especially the part about the very strange idea that one can walk around in San Francisco completely naked. To me it’s just strange; even disgusting. I would think it impractical too; where does one keep the wallet and the keys? I think it’s dangerous to walk around naked, but I live in Louisiana where the mosquitoes would have a buffet of unimaginable proportions. Not to mention one hell of a sun burn. Still, certain things are just uncouth, public nudity is way up high on the list.

But R. Emmett Tyrrell, the publisher of the magazine and author of the piece still is a bit puzzled over the gay thing, which he somehow tries to tie in marriage with this nudity thing. Oh, years ago he was a lot worse, he’s come a long way, baby. I hope he comes a little further down the pike, I do. He uses the phrase “goes too far” as his riff, or motif, and I point out to him that there are many on the Right who go way too far in their unholy unChristian and unAmerican campaign to rid the nation of her gay citizens. Here, I try to help him, by posting this there to him:

Though, but first, a little visual imagery of the “gay problem” in this nation, and how we’re all trying to figure it out:

Yes, that’s one of my maze paintings, complex eh? Like life itself, indeed.  OK, the article >>

Well, Mr. Tyrrell, one reason I’ve been reading this magazine for 3 decades is that you are very correct on many things. But as usual, you are a bit perplexed about us gay folks. I don’t know what liberals want or think any more than you do; I’m appalled at the public nudity in SF. But I don’t live there, I live in Louisiana, where the mosquitoes would eat you alive if you tried nudity outside, I assure you. So, first, don’t lump us all together. Yes, we got Frank and San Fran, and well, you heteros, you got Pelosi, and well, San Fran. I can’t vote there, I can’t get them out of office, anymore than you can.

But on whom wants what — it is we gays who have always requested some decency, and yes, marriage. From the very beginning, in the 1950s, not the Stonewall Riot, no. And we had to beg the liberal heteros just as much as we keep begging you conservatives; and many of them still don’t get it.

Alas, some of you still “go too far” — I dare say for Tony Perkins of the FRC and Bryan Fischer of the AFA to repeatedly call for my arrest for merely smooching whom I wish to smooch is way too far. It’s nuts. To arrest us all, and incarcerate us together, for being together, well, that’s just weird logic. But he’s trying, maybe you should tell him to shush for “going too far.”

As for marriage; well, I understand the problem you have with the word, I do. Years ago I proposed “twainage” — I have also said that if hetero family law is say, Title 2, and we don’t fit it, or you don’t want us in it, then give us Title 2.5 already, and be done with it.

We keep telling you we’re born this way; many of you still are basically calling us liars by saying “choose” — we don’t know why. What can I say, folks are just wrong on this; put us on the autism spectrum and stop the “evil” stuff.

But then too, I know two couples here in my city, Richard & Guy, and James & Kyle. Each couple has been together for over 32 years. Each owns one of the gay bars in town, and their own homes, and both bars have been going for more than 30 years. And if that’s not small business Main Street American married couple tax paying decent citizens I don’t know what is. Ironically, one of those bars is literally on Main Street!

Now these two couples have had to go through legal gyrations of many kinds to effect what they need to do — and in a way the state already recognizes the “partnership” for we partners do it through commercial law. And so your mission is to figure out how to move all these gay couples, and more to come (us older gays never got much relationship practice, so it won’t be us; but younger couples abound — like the one redecorating the house down the block from me. I don’t know them, they seem happy though,) away from the hodgepodge of commercial law to the conformity of family law, even if by a special section for us.

And along the way stop the arrant nonsense that gay people are “Attacking” anything. I can’t help it if some liberal gays are ninnies, but us conservative gays try to talk them out of it. But I can’t do much with guys like Rick Santorum simply going way too far in calling for my criminalization once again to save my my family. And you know, I address these many things on my blog, which links through my name; perhaps you might go and learn a thing or two of my family values and what I want. Thanks.

End >>

And well, I think that’s enough for today. I shall now go tend the 89 year old I tend, and help him through his day in his own home – because as Maggie Gallagher of the bizarrely named “national organization for marriage” says I’m unfit for human company. Bizarrely named, yes, for its sole purpose is to debase, destroy, prevent, and harass any marriage or unions or even a simple smooch between us gay folks – she’s not “for” anything, except slander and libel against me, oh, but I digress – this woman says I’m pretty much a worthless human being with no values and no decency who is out to wreck her world by not wanting hers in mine. She wants to “help” me find myself or something. Why doesn’t she haul her tuckus down here and help me out? I need a break from my labors. I need to go paint a flower painting:

I doubt I could get an NEH or NEA grant, however. My art is too happy; not controversial enough.




  1. It is really sad to me that people find the nude human body offensive. I can understand the old out of shape nudists but even so, if someone is a sincerely true nudist, how can you condemn what you have never experienced yourself. At least be a bit more compationate to the feelings of others. Nudism has been very important in my life. To the extent of keeping me healthy both physically and more so mentally. You can never convince me that the folks who are clothed are saints when it comes to sexuality. Just note the population. Somebody is indulging in the pleasures of the flesh. That’s the problem, too many people, too many opinions, with all of them forcing their dysfunctional beliefs on everyone else. Relax. Live and let live.

  2. A documented experience of my nude walking tour being halted after one block and 200 feet. So much for a perceived open minded city. I can not express how saddened I am, that my plans for three nude walks in the city were shut down in less than three minutes. Two weeks of extensive research lead me to believe I could actually realize this experience after learning of the “Towel Ordinance” last September, The anticipation grew to such a high level of exhilaration I was completely unprepared emotionally for the let down I felt when stopped so quickly.

    Read my experience at the link above and help me through this by educating SF residents of the law so complaints may be less likely.

    The “I don’t want my children to see” excuse holds no water for me, my 23 son just graduated from Reed College, and my daughter is in her 4th year at CSUN doing fantastic. Both my kids are very well adjusted, with heathy mental attitudes. I couldn’t ask for a better result with who they came to be. My being a nudist harmed them in no way and I feel strongly they are well adjusted without ridiculous body hangups. When are we going to stop teaching our children be ashamed of their bodies. Don’t you know what kids will do if you tell them to stay out of the cookie jar.

    As for sexual motivation, the morning before the hike I had a medical scare of passing blood in my urine, scared to death, I sought care at an Urgent Care center at 26 California Street. After, I felt better about the situation I proceeded to start my hike, pretty difficult to feel sexual after that. I actually polled a few people on the way to the urgent care about my intentions, and received positive encouragement. It was the hardest thing I ever did as a nudist to get naked and go for a walk in the city. The nude walk for me was about freedom, exhilaration, and just the simple feel of the sun and yes the freezing cold wind that day. I was fine walking. But I froze to death while the officer who stopped me, and held there in one spot until I received a riot act from some lady who had a stalking incident in her life, showed up. Had I been allowed to continue on my power walk, she never would have encountered me. While I understand the officer needed to do his job for public safety, the time it took me to show him I understood the law and was not a threat, allowed this lady to catch up. If SFPD officers were all on the same page he would have let me continue, and at my pace of walking I would have been blocks away from that lady. Not to say some other puritan with dysfunctional beliefs about the glorious amazing human body wouldn’t have appeared and complained. People, it’s just a body, come on! Read more at Thank you.

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