A Gay Man’s Life against Political Homosexuality
If politicians are so sure that a gay man is a threat to his family where were any of them when the Twin Towers were attacked and I had to console my niece and nephew in the agonizing days afterward as we slowly realized that their father was among the dead?
Where was Tony Perkins to rush in to save a family from the horrors of a gay man making sure the kids were fed while their mother, my sister, spent endless hours on the phone with who knows who? My brother-in-law was killed there, who did he lose?
Where was Rick Santorum the night that this gay man, me, stayed up until the kids, wired from exhaustion and fear, they being only 11 and 13 at the time, impressionable youth even, finally fell asleep? Why did he not rush in to save them from my clutches?
Who did Peter Sprigg call within my family to arrange things, and console, and give some guidance and semblance of order, for I am a calm and practical man, as the hours, days and weeks and months, and now, ten years later, unfolded, so that a gay man might not attack and destroy the family, as he claims I do, while calling me a “domestic terrorist” – while real life foreign terrorists were attacking me and mine? He sees 9/11 as a symbol, I see it quite a it differently.
Why didn’t Michelle Bachmann come to save those two, and the kids of all the other firemen families I knew, who got together in huddled masses, since this gay man was left to watch them all, and explain things, and hold them if they cried, and play with them, as the widows talked among themselves? I know a dozen men killed – who does she know? What funerals did she attend? How many memorials was she involved in, and me at so many?
If New Gingrich is sure I’m some threat to the nation, where was he to take my sister and kids down to Pier 94 so that they could meet with all they had to meet with, and I made sure they had every blessed piece of paper any bureaucrat would want at the ready? Why didn’t he or a henchmen volunteer, 10 years later, come to drive my nephew’s pick up 1,500 miles to pick him up from his circumnavigation of the globe so that a gay man might not debase the presence of a hero’s son?
How come Maggie Gallagher didn’t come to take my place at the funeral at NYC’s largest synagogue, for he was one of three Jewish firemen taken, with 5,000 inside and 100,000 outside, as I walked through the silence with my family, so that a gay man with no family values and against family and God and country, as she proclaims, would not sully the proceedings? And why doesn’t she water the plants in that man’s honor room at my sister’s house like I do, so that my family might be protected from my “evil” as she and her church say I am?
I could go on, but when I think of these people constantly bleating I’m against the family in some nebulous way they can’t define other than “We’re heterosexuals, we don’t want to be gay, and not you either,” I’m sore amazed. Well, no shit Sherlock, you folks are indeed heterosexuals, and quite rampant about it. Hardly a day goes by when some number of you aren’t getting married, having babies, going for marriage counseling, beating the living crap out of each other, shooting each other up, getting divorced, and going on the Jerry Springer show. Have at it people; I don’t understand the heterosexual lifestyle apparently anymore than you understand it; for a hell of a lot of you seem to be rather terrible at it. Well, I don’t know how to advise you except try to be a little nicer to teach other.
And yet you politicians and religious figures have constructed some fantasy world of a “homosexual lifestyle” of “homosexuality” and the “homosexual agenda” pushed by the “homosexual lobby” – what this consortium of ideas is, to you, as near as I can figure out, is that we are involved in near constant sex and marauding through the playgrounds to look for new victims while raiding churches and tearing up weddings while trying to bring down the Republic. Beats me where you get this delusion, but delusion it is. Well I’m tired of listening to it, for sure.
It is intellectually dishonest for these politicians and religious figures to keep up this harping about the “homosexual lifestyle.” They have to know it’s not true, don’t they? Don’t they realize we own many a florist shop that puts up flowers at heterosexual weddings? Don’t they contemplate the flight(y) attendant on their many jaunts around the nation, you know, he who bolts the cockpit door and then brings coffee? Are they that insulated with henchmen that they never see the slight slim fey man behind the front desk at the Raddison who makes sure they have a comfy place to sleep? Have they never talked to the sashaying concierge at the Hilton to find their way some anti-gay confab? Do they not get waited on by some wispy lispy gay guy with a job called “waiter” at some restaurant so they have sustenance to work at hounding us for a living? Have they never gone to a mainline Protestant church and heard the organist, who is 85% likely to be a gay guy? Do they not know we have jobs and homes?
For how do they think we fund all this, this alleged assault on everything? Where do they think we live? Do they think we live in caves and come out only at night so we can prey on the kids in the school grounds during the day? Do they think we meet in secret covens to decide which high school jock to lure into the “homosexual lifestyle” by telling him what the poor kid has look forward to is endless crap from people like these politicians and religious figures? Do they believe that we have endless gobs of money in tax free pits so that we can fund the “homosexual lobby”?
My friend joked at a barbecue last night, Friday, that we 20 or so gay guys met for the “First Thursday Society for the Destruction of the Family’s Youth Seducing Strategy Session & Potluck Dinner.” I mean, really; I see this all the time. This bizarre idea that we’re out to take over the country and make everyone gay, or, conversely, somehow if a nice thing is said about us, every high school kid in the nation will stop beating us up as sissies and come smooch one of us. It’s laughably absurd; yet dangerous on a political level, for some of these people talk of laws to rid us from the nation, somehow.
For isn’t that what laws are supposed to do, get rid of a problem? Hasn’t stopped you heterosexuals from murdering each other, but hey, that’s not my problem, just keep it away from me. Thankfully, not being married to a murderous husband I’m fairly safe from any wife beating. And given the numbers of Safe Shelters for Women that are required, I dare say you heterosexual men think women are punching bags. We prefer to do their hair or design the alluring dresses to entice you so that you might reproduce the species in gay interior design decorated houses; and weirdly, along the way, churn out a steady 5% of the population as us folks. We do appreciate it; but now that you made us, can you stop the nonsense, please?
Look, here I am a year after the 9/11 attacks, playing piano in Phoenix Arizona, at Christmastide. My Lord, nothing says destruction of tradition like a guy playing the piano with a poinsettia on the lid. Little is clearer than gay men wreck families by playing Christmas Carols within 20 feet of a Christmas tree. The sheer horror of a gay guy in a blue blazer should strike terror into the hearts of all who come and say “Thank you for your beautiful music” and drop a tip in my jar. And nothing says Preposterous like the belief that I’m anything more or less than a family man who takes care of my own life while bring mirth and merriment to all whom I encounter.
I often wonder if these people are this seriously delusional. And I oft come to the sad conclusion that they are. I know this, though, I got a straight from the heart 9/11 commemorative T-shirt, to honor real men, and none of these political hussies did. I might give them one if they asked nicely, and said “OK, we’ll stop the nonsense, sorry.” Meanwhile, while wearing it I wonder if I put too many notes in my music, talk to my family too much, and butter my toast too loudly for their gentle souls, also. But if these politicians want to know a little of God, country and family, then they should come talk to me, and I shall have a thing or two to say.
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