Jesus came back for gay folks, too

Jesus came back for gay folks, too, you know.

Happy Easter, which for many people is indeed a very happy day. And I especially want to wish Mr. Stacey Campbell of the Tennessee state legislature a Happy Easter, for he does need to learn the lesson of the day. It eludes him. Badly. Still, it’s a happy day for billions, and good for them. For they believe Jesus came back to lead them to the promised land. It is good that these people do so, it seems to still their frazzled nerves. Billions of people all over the world will celebrate somehow today. There will be a great diversity in this. Which always puzzles me why there’s all this call for “diversity” when there’s plenty of it. Too much even for some people, apparently.

For instance, this Tennessee state representative, Stacey Campbell – he thinks there’s too many gay people, and he aims to put a stop to it by passing a law! To like, prevent anymore – since by outlawing the word no kid will be “Learning” to be gay. Amazing, and not very Jesus like. For no where in the teachings of Jesus is “get rid of the gay people.” Not a blessed word. But only “treat others as you want to be treated.” “Love thy neighbor as thyself.” Stuff like that, all very worthwhile advice, and which most people, oh, 95% of them, have followed since the dawn of time, in every culture, Jesus in the mix or not.

And then well, there’s 5%. There are three parts to this group. One is the common criminal, the murderer and the thief, and even the white collar criminals running off with grandma’s cash in a scheme. The second is politicians who like to use the power of the state to really maul their people. Khaddafi is a good example today, but so are the leaders of Burma and North Korea. But also so too were Stalin and Hitler, and many more on down the ages. Ivan the Terrible, Czar of all the Russias isn’t called that because he wasn’t. He even killed his own son. Which did put a crimp in the dynasty planning, so we got the Romanov’s. Which led to Lenin. Unbelievable slaughter the whole way through. Mostly over people not conforming to the political class’s dictates.

And the third group is the overly religious – not the holy rollers who spend their time in churches doing good deeds and praying, those seeking salvation for themselves as they believe it to be found. They’re a peaceful lot. Nuns, they’re a peaceful lot, and it’s hard to dish nuns, it’s rightfully frowned upon. But these overly religious who think they know how to run other people’s lives; like this Stacey fellow. It’s very difficult to run one’s own life, what with all that stuff called living going on. But to spend your days doing nothing more pseudo-productive than demanding some other people to do your bidding or suffer constant condemnation in the public press is sort of absurd. It’s definitely not what Jesus would have done.

Really, ask yourself, What Would Jesus Do with gay folks? Would he smite us? Would he cast some demons out? He never did cast out a gay demon to save a man. Though he did warn against Pharisees preaching words while doing nothing but counting their wealth. And Peter Sprigg, Tony Perkins, Bryan Fischer, Maggie Gallagher, these people, and more, and Stacey living off the gay man’s dime – for there’s enough taxes paid by all the gay man in his district to pay his salary and perks, and the hetero’s money going to better things. They have become wealthy by simply being busybodies in my life and trying to stop me from doing it as I have been directed by God to do so.

This Mr. Campbell – we must say that Mr. – for his first name is often a girl’s name. We would want to gender confusion. No, that would be uncharitable. Though, maybe that’s his problem. He’s pissed at his parents for giving him a girl’s name and he’s going to take it out on me. It’s nuts, but hey. So he wants to outlaw the use of the word “gay” in schools – and I laugh, why the big problem my dear Mr. Campbell is that the heteros use the phrase “that’s so gay” to like, you know, dis the thing. To make fun of it. It’s not cool to be “that’s so gay” about anything. And now, what with Zero Tolerance for infractions of rules of late, every hetero kid is going to get into trouble for using the word “gay.” I would certainly demand such action. After all Mr. Campbell does want to protect the children. Even the gays one’s, though in a weird way because he’s outlawing the derogatory use of the term – it sort of helps in the anti-bullying effort. Why, if I were a gay kid’s lawyer I would certainly agitate for the hetero’s boys to stop saying “that’s so gay” about my gay client. And Mr. Campbell, in unintentional thoughtlessness has provide the tool. Which is a Happy Easter thing indeed.

Though sadly, oppositely, in a weird unAmerican censorship way, to deprive gay people of the use of a common word in the language for 800 years come this very Easter meaning, well, “that’s so gay,” is sort of beyond lunacy. How can a child learn of Richard the Lionhearted, King of England in real life, gay as a duck, and his own mother Eleanor of Aquitaine had to tell him that? Used the word “gai” too. After all, Robinhood is involved. Oh yea, it’s gay King Richard back from being ransomed by his mother, having been captured by the Holy Roman Emperor, who bless the marriage of Robin too Maid Marion. Alas, Richard died without a kid – because he was gay – and his evil brother John became king. Such a bully they not only extracted the Magna Carta out of him for Liberty against bullying, but no king ever named a son John ever again. Not a one. Now how are you going to teach history without the gay part? Do tell, I ask.

Still, the man thinks that gayness is a learned behavior. Who taught Richard is not known. And yet, like every single other hetero with this confounded mind block, he couldn’t come up with a teachable moment if he tried. No one seems to be able to pinpoint with more certainty than that we have this “temperment” or “pre-disposition” or something akin, which we choose to have later on, after we’re “exposed in the environment” to some gay cootie, but took to it like a duck on a June bug. And also too we need a weak father, and a too strong father, though an absent father too will do if dad is like a perfect military general like General Peck was as he spoke in Congress against his gay son. For family values even, to denigrate one’s own child, sigh. One would think Jesus would have something to say about that.

But besides these factors there’s the too strong or standoffish mom, the lech of an uncle, the neighbor down the block and a Broadway show or two. And through all these lessons learned we become gay. And somewhere across the seas, in a tiny town in Indonesia, without ever a television set, some boy goes “Whoa, this is different” in the local lingo. It’s a learning experience? Because the word gay is used in a public school in Nashville the far away Brazilian boy goes “Whoa, this is different” in his local lingo? This is what Mr. Stacey thinks? He with the gender bender of a name? No wonder the man man’s an idiot.

He had the audacity to just dismiss the claims of millions of gay people – – right there on a radio show, and in his legislative office no doubt. Just basically call us liars to our faces and put his own cocksure cockamamie ideas into our heads with a heathen disregard for reality it’s breathtaking. One scientist said that it would have to be an unfathombably large synchronized mass fib telling if it weren’t true we’re born this way.

And yet, there’s Mr Campbell, with soup for brains, just dismissing the whole idea as our fantasy while creating his own. For everyone who says it’s learned behavior and can thus be unlearned has their own version of particulars. Often, like the Archbishop of the Armed Forces, as clear as “It’s for largely unexplained reasons.” And well, clarity is a strong point of religion, isn’t it? Why, they can’t even all agree on the words of which Bible to use. And the one chosen most often was compiled by a gay guy named King James I who’s father was the very gay Lord Darnley. Quite the bit of irony, in the reality of this history which shall now not be taught, but it does escape most of the King’s version’s followers.

And so now I’m just going to enjoy the rest of the day – and give you a picture of Jesus and a gay guy – and the club the gay guy is holding is the club which the 42 year old never married closet case who is trying to solve his own demons by outlawing a word of the English language – and actually – due to the nature of the word – outlawing it specifically for use by us gay people. This must be one of those amazing special rights that gays enjoy at the hands of religionists like Mr. Campbell intent to stomp out God’s creation. Happy Easter, to even Mr. Campbell, as Jesus tells us to feel in our hearts. I do, he doesn’t. He should trying learning some better behavior.

He should start with “What the Bible Really Says About Homosexuality” by Father Daniel A. Helminiak, Ph. D. It might get the mot out of his eye so he can see clearly the teachings of the man many celebrate today.


1 Comment


    1. Jesus came back for gay folks, too « The Daily Mush | MyGaySpot

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