Enviro Rex

It’s being reported this morning in many sites on the Internet that some Washington Post reporter of some kind is calling for an end to air-conditioning. Yah, from his air-conditioned house, car or office, no doubt, he doth say this:

A.C.’s obvious public-health benefits during severe heat waves do not justify its lavish use in everyday life for months on end.” So glad he’s to decide what’s justified or lavish, and when. My, what they do teach in ‘journalism schools.’

He blathers on: “Less than half a century ago, America thrived with only the spottiest use of air conditioning.” He fails to mentioned we thrived back then with a lot less of the taxes and government that the Washington Post endorses, too.

On he goes: “It could again. While central air will always be needed in facilities such as hospitals, archives and cooling centers for those who are vulnerable to heat, what would an otherwise A.C.-free Washington look like?”

Well then, let’s start from the last phrase and move backwards, since that’s what this guy is calling for, turning back the clock some 50 years, (and I thought it was just Republicans who wanted to, um, turn back the clock,) to the good old days of Democratic enforced Jim Crow laws right there in Washington, which were un-AC’d.

First, what would DC look like without AC? Well, when? During the winter I’m sure they’d have the heat on. In late Spring through early Fall probably the AC. So six or seven months on, six or five off. And if it’s off from say May to September, well, we just might see less congressional sessions and that can’t be a bad thing. So I might well argue for no AC for DC government structures. Yah, that’ll fix ’em. They’re frying us, they may as well fry too.

But second, look at his list of “important” places to be exempted – hospitals – no brainer. And they’ll be filled by the truck load after the AC is cut off all over town by those “vulnerable to heat,” which is, um, all of us. Though killing off the vulnerable by restricting their AC would help reduce health care costs, which the Post is always fretting about.

And archives? Is the man kidding? We’re to cool the books? I know Washington is cooking the books, but now to cool them too? Surely if we were to be environmentally friendly and daffy at the same time we could burn the archives during the winter months in the nearby power plants for heat. But really, we people should be all hot, sweaty and uncomfortable so the books might be chilled?

Third, isn’t it a point of fact uttered over and over again by the Left-Loonies that “hot summers in the city” lead to more violence, beatings and shootings? Sure it has. Which is why they want all those energy subsidy plans, and free cooling for the elderly. Which would impact on those cool hospitals too. In fact, if the Left-Loonies are right about heat waves leading to crime, versus say, personal forbearance at criminal behavior, shouldn’t he be calling for air-conditioners in every house, rich and poor alike? But no AC, hence more crime, and then the pressing public issue will be if prisons should be AC’d too. Which they must be, I’m sure. To prevent cruel and inhuman treatment per Amendment 8. I mean, if prisoners get all manner of pleasures now, surely no one thinks AC is to be denied them. Do they? Or will the ACLU (The Air-conditioned Left-Loonies Union?) go to court real quick to ensure, like books, the prisoners are cooled while the people suffer.

And cooling centers? No doubt to bring the people together, the easier to indoctrinate, for what will they do there for endless hours? And sleep there in the public dormitories, like in North Korea. And it is such a captive audience. But still, metaphysically, if all the people go to cooling centers can they create one big enough to hold them all? I mean, how is anyone going to decide who gets entry? Just the elderly, who have difficulty in mobility, ripped from their AC’d house to sit on folding chairs in centers? Or perhaps the children, but not the mothers, so that they might be wards of the state for a few more hours each day? Or will they let in moms, children and grandmothers, leaving the menfolk outside and cranky?

The idea is preposterous of course. And the fact that a major newspaper gave this crank just one column inch is ludicrous. And if this “journalist” would have known, the AC of today is just so much more power effective than that of just 10 years ago, never mind 40 years. And what does he have against comfort? Perhaps he likes the smell of sweaty men at home and office.

But if he was really concerned, really really – he’d get his tuckus out of the journalism business, return to engineering school and do what he can to develop an AC unit that cools so efficiently that it’s like using the light bulbs that they’ve outlawed for too much heat.

But for a guy who works for a megamillion dollar corporation which cuts down a few trees a day or more to complain about people trying to keep comfortable (which being the goal of all humans since the dawn of time) is sort of moronic. No, not sort of at all, definitely moronic.

Meanwhile, our Advocate does declare: Lake Pontchartrain Monitored. Right there on page one.

Yeah, and what point is that? Of what point is it to watch, oh, I’m sorry, let’s get technical, monitor, oil move into the lake through the narrow channel which connects it to the Gulf? Shouldn’t the boom and barrier have been laid down a while back along the waterway? Now they’ll monitor? Geez.

Amazingly, now, some 80 days into the spill, with all the well known possible consequences so obvious, we find that Tangipohoa Parish president Gordon Burgess is “attempting to arrange for booms.” Couldn’t it be reported that he called up the Federal Boommeister to get the boom delivered? And this from a parish well inland, on the lake. And now he’s got to “Attempt,” because Obama didn’t lay the booms down right away? And still this Advocate is mum on the incompetence of the president. No, not incompetence, obstructionism.

Why is that not the headline: “Obama obstructionism monitored in destruction of Lake P.” That’s the headline. Not “oh bummers, 80 days from day one and we’re still doing nothing but monitoring.”

I won’t even get into the front page headline “insurgent attacks kill 13.” These insurgents, against what do they surge? The Taliban are not insurgents. They are murderous terrorists,a and Medieval morons, and ancient statue killers. Indeed, they are akin to AC haters like the Washington Post writer. They are hateful animals who destroy and kill all in their way. Get this sentence from the unsigned Associated Press piece on page one:

International and Afghan commandos have been conducting near nightly raids to capture or kill insurgents, while the Taliban have launched attacks on army bases and local officials and planted thousands of roadside bombs.

First, it’s not clear – are the Taliban and the insurgents the same? So, the T-I (taliban insurgents) want to set the clock back like, oh, 50 years ago, hell, 500 if they could, and then for real environmentally safe living conditions. No AC for you Afghanis!

But then – where on earth could they get “thousands” of bombs? Who is supplying them? And shouldn’t the US just bomb the bomb builders? “Sometime,” like Clemenza said to Michael Corleone, in the Godfather, “sometimes these things happen, every 10, 20 years, you got to have a war, get rid of the bad blood, you know.” Well, time to just either bomb until nothing moves, or leave. But this fighting “insurgents” is pointless if they can lay down “thousands” of bombs. Maybe the bomb layers are illegal aliens, and thus to be given the free pass.

Then the biggest headline of them all: “BP to capture all oil ‘at some point’ “ — well, yes, that’s what they were trying to do in the first place. This sort of headline is pointless. Of course that’s what BP does for a living – they capture oil at some point in time and space and make gasoline and stuff out of it.

Shouldn’t the headline be “President goes golfing instead of monitoring latest attempts to plug the damn hole” ? – sure it should, but this paper is a Democratic “independent” voice, using Associated Press stories for stuff that’s happening just miles from it’s air-conditioned offices which it’s reporters will not leave apparently.

But then, sad news, from Envirolandia Vermont. Seems some environmentally conscious artist did hobble together a lot of scrap wood and build himself a dinosaur on his own property with his own two hands, and the hands of assorted volunteers. Quite a big one. Life size. He named it “vermontasaurus.” The Rex – Latin for king, indeed – is not amused. They did tell him to take his vermontasaurus down, or else, or something.

It’s not art, it’s a structure, akin to a shed or gazebo – and he needed a $272 permit for it.” That’s the shakedown by Taliban-like kingly power. A piece of art, in the best tradition of American Road Side art which even National Public Radio and Public Broadcasting do celebrate as our quirky thing, like the big ball of twine in Iowa and the Cadillac Ranch near Amarillo. And yet the town’s selectmen saw a way to garnish money out of it. With no chairs within, no place to sit under it, or near it, and no doors, windows, sills, or anything of a “room-like” nature, such as shed and gazebo offer, and the greedy Rex did decide that this art was a usable building. Bizarre.

Even more bizarre, the state Division of Fire Safety said if Mr. Boland, the artist, couldn’t get a structural engineer to attest to the “sculpture’s” safety he could not allow people near it.

So the state said it’s dangerous art, and the town said it’s an unpermitted structure. How bizarre, that art itself,on one’s own land is subject government approval and permits now. And it’s environmentally sound too, made of scrap. No word on if the EPA came in to tell Mr. Boland to send his volunteers to “sensitivity training” before the hammerfest of building.

One “critic,” a Ms. Mary Wilson, called it a “messy piece of art.” Apparently this lady never saw a Jackson Pollock painting she liked either. Perhaps if Boland had put up a scrap wood sculpture of Karl Marx in Socialist Vermont it would have been more pleasing to the forces of power.


1 Comment

  1. wfr

    As art, Vermontasaurus is 100% successful, drawing attention, and drawing attention to the artist. It is on an airport runway. So far there have been no collisions between airplanes and art appreciators wandering around the sculpture with their cameras

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