Some wonder, indeed.

Warning: There’s a crack in the facade of the AP and our Advocate that government is the solution.

And AP and our Advocate do think that big government is the solution. Their articles are daily filled with hope, change, audaciousness and belief that big government can solve every problem. Endless come the ecomiums on how wonderful federal money is – and the politicians who “bring home the bacon.” Limitless are the issues which the president should address, once he leaves the golf course. Examined and found wonderful are every plan and proposal for ever more government. Boundless is the belief that Washington must come to the resuce. There is never any word that perhaps, just perhaps, the big government is the issue. Until today. My my, can it be so?

The headline is “Some wonder if jobs bill will create jobs.” A fearless AP writer, one Jim Abrams, and the Advocate editors concocted this step back from the precipice of more government. Not quite far enough, but it’s a start. Not quite right, either, but it sure leans in the right direction. The correct way to say it is: “All wonder if jobs bill will create jobs.” The skeptics of course rightly point out that no jobs and/or stimulus bill ever created jobs except on the federal payroll which causes all sorts of problems down the road and stimulates all manner of bizarre chicanery among the sharp witted who – and who can blame them, somewhat – in the immortal words of Plunkett of Tamany Hall – “I seen the opportunity and I took it.” Tamany Hall is of course the leading light of corruption in America. None beat it for audacity, not even our most audacious here in Louisiana. It’s old history of course, back in the mid to late 1800s in New York City when William Marcy Tweed got ahold of the Democratic Party machine in New York and got himself a series of pliant mayors and city council members and city commissioners to make all sorts of wonderful public projects. Tamany Hall was the name of their club house, and it stands still right there at Union Square on the 16th Street northside.

You can see two of the, um, better opportunities this very day. One is Central Park. That fantastically huge green space in the middle of Manhattan, reknowned the worldover for any number of reasons, films, books, and storybook weddings. But not often mentioned are the 250,000 shovels purchased by Plunkett for the make-work jobs bill mother of them all. Not that there were 250,000 shovelers, nor that all the shovels were delivered, or even made. It is still unknown if there were even 250,000 shovels in all America at the time. Still the unknown contract was let out, just like there are some 14,000 vaguely known contracts around Louisiana that the State Treasurer, Mr. Kennedy would like to know about. Who knows how many unknown contracts are out and about in the last stimulus bill? The record is so mush-headed that jobs were created in congressional districts that hadn’t been invented yet. Still, none come close to 250,000 shovels for the “shovel ready” projects that our college educated work force should dig ditches for.

Yes, that’s right – our president and flunkies of all kinds bleat incessantly that we need a most modern college educated work force – all to dig the ditches of our times with whatever shovels might be lying about. But still, every jaunt through the fabled scenery of Central Park is a walk through corruption. And if Tweed and Plunkett weren’t there to be corrupt, well, the park might never have been built. After all, the streets were already laid out and there were already buildings going up before eminent domain came along and took that all away. The land at the time was the most expensive in the city – even though it was relatively unimproved, parts wild even – because first the Tamany guys would buy the land and then sell it to the city at a favorable price. In todays dollars it may well dwarf the amount that Landrieu “secured” for us in the still not passed final legislation of similar merit.

The other is the Tweed Courthouse. This is the poor ugly sister of the New York City Hall, that delicate marble and lace trim building that no one really suspects is the City Hall for the mightiest city on earth. It’s so tiny! It’s so dainty! It’s so cute! Really? City Hall for New York? Are you serious? Yet, the Statue of Justice on top is unique, too. She has her blind fold lifted up, unlike the other Statues of Blind Justice around the world, so that she might see the shennanigans that bewitches New York City Hall. Ah, but Tweed’s building is right behind the cute sister. In 1870 it cost $15,000,000 to build. Which was about 10 times more than the average $1,500,000 Fifth Ave Vanderbilt, Mellon, Carnegie and Frick Barons of Industry and Banking mansion cost at the same time. And they were a lot fancier, and often bigger. Still, there were 150,000 brooms ordered to keep this Palace of the People clean. Again, not that they were ever delievered or even made. But the resourceful Plunkett did let out the contracts that wound him up on the witness stand at his trial for corruption in which he uttered his immoral words.

Just 45 years later, a man named Frank W. Woolworth – he of 5 and Dime fame, and lunch counters throughout the nation, the very evil Walmart of his times (and the press coverage then of the retail giant is eerily like the press coverage of Walmart today) – built a 65 Story Building – the Tallest in the World at the time and for many years to come – it is right there across the street from City Hall Park in NYC, within a four minute walk of the attack on our nation, and from the Tweed Courthouse. How much did Frank pay for his “cathedral of commerce,” as it was dubbed, when the famed architect Cass Gilbert revealed the plans? Why, $15,000,000 dollars. The exact same price as for the lowly three story high Tweed Courthouse. By the time old Frank came along Tweed had long died in prison, there for malfeasance and corruption and lord knows what else, and did not get to see what he really could have built if he wanted to.

But back in the future, the Democrats are merely hopeful that this latest attempt doomed to failure will mop up some of the unemployment created by their policies in time for the 2010 elections so that they might return to their regularly scheduled destruction of the free enterprise system. There still is seizing control of our hearts and bodies through seizing control of the health care system, there are still thousands of pages of new taxes, laws, rules and regulations concerning energy, enivornment, workplace, homeplace, schoolplace and who knows where else, and of course righting the College Bowl Championship Series to make sure everything is very, very fair. There is a never ending parade of such legislation out of Congress. Starting back in McKinley’s day, it has accelerated of late now that the power mad self proclaimed elite realize how lucrative it can be. Why, even Al Gore has been able to eke out a $1,000,000,000 in stimulus of one sort or another. They are the Tweeds of our time, of course. More so, they are the most witful among us, for they aren’t taking opportunities to seize federal dollars thrown liberally (pun intended) around – no, they are taking the opportunity to seize the entire economy of the country.

So that they might manage it. And there on page 2A is the blazing headline of the wackinesss — “Fed chief says close regulation can control investment bubbles.” No, it cannot. Though close regulation can both cause bubbles and cause strangulation of the economy in general. As is so obvious by now, but which still the AP and many others cannot see. Though why that should be so is hard to determine. If controlling bubbles is what it is all about – well, every few years sees a bubble, for that is the nature of the natural economy. It’s part of the ebb and flow of free markets. But our government of the day will have none of it – for stability – for sureness. For the power, too, but why mention such sullied stuff as power when you can talk about how you are bringing jobs to the people.

And what does our State do? It touts its own version of bringing jobs to the people stimulus bills. Blazaend just inches from the forlorn hopeful wondering of opportunities to seize comes this: “Expectations high for new La. Business.” Well, yes, expectations are always high for business. Alas, it seems business has been skittish. What are just some of the problems that Gary Perilloux, an Advocate “business writer” points to? These: “Recession, difficult financing conditions and uncertainty about federal environmental legislation stalled many industrial projects the state sought to win in 2009.” Yes, well, now, see, there you go – big government caused recession, big government borrowing 789 billion bucks to stimulate us, and thus taking 789 billion bucks out of the capital markets, which means that there are, um, difficult financing conditions, and too, more taxes, rules, laws and regulations.

So many so that in the very article benath that is the headline “DEQ division targets crimes.” Perilloux did not consult Amy Wold, a mere “staff writer” for our Advocate, and apparently the editors did not give him the information, about this threat to business. For the threat of criminal action for conducting business is indeed an impediment to doing business of any kind. Not to mention the complaince that might be mandated by the Department of Environmental Quality and it’s big brothers up in DC, the EPA and the DOE. All them rules and laws are opportunities taken right out of the hands of business. Maybe one could argue that there is some environmental regulation needed – but shoudn’t it be on a more cooperative level? Why is it by threat of fine and/or imprisonment? Are business people so craven as to destroy where we live unless the government comes in and runs the show? Not that the previous regulations are what was complied with. Or that knowledge progressed to the point where we can, in hindsight, say: oops, we did not known that, now we’ve got to fix that. But such prior compliance and lack of knowledge might very well now be a criminal offense. Which is rough on business indeed.

And what sort of companies are we bringing to our everybody-should-be-in-college state where the schools actively turn out mush heads who can’t do math or write simple English but do esteem their navels and their ethnicity’s and all ethnicities, except for Dead White European Male’s ethnicity’s, cultural contribution to our great land?

One is the V-Vehicle — for which we are paying $300,000,000 in federal energy department loans to jump start probably perhaps 1400 jobs – or $214,000 a job – not a bad opportunity at all, as Plunkett would have seen. For what is the V? No one knows. And if it never gets built? Well, oh well, too bad, at least the loans will have done something for someone. If they don’t get paid back I’m sure there’s a taxpayer funded loan guarantee payback system somehow, or a new debt ceiling that can be voted into effect to handle the issue.

Another is renaming a company – so many graphic artists are needed for that – and all because of a merger – which will thus create not one new job anywhere – in fact, most mergers result in a loss of jobs, for how many mail boys does one need in the new corporate office? And so we get the opportunity to get the headquarters. Alas, some Midwest city is losing the 350 jobs that we might add. Too bad for them. They should have shoveled more money, as our fearless Jindal did, into the hands of Embarq Corp so they could have bought CenturyTel, our player in the game, and moved our jobs there. Alas, someday soon some other company will buy the combined twain and take it all away to someother fine place where “new” jobs will be created, but “old” jobs will be lost. Not to mention losing all those economic development funds that fell out of the governor’s pockets.

On and on come the shifting about of existing jobs that are called new. And on and on are the bribes paid to companies to move here, until someone else bribes them to move elsewhere. Well, that’s all part of the “some wonder if jobs bill will … “ do anything. It’s always good, however, to know where the opportunities are, in case you have to take them. I just hope that none of these knaves winds up in jail, for there is hardly any more space in them, what with all the new laws creating criminals as fast as we can. And now, through health care, virtually the entire populace is either going to get in the job creation industry by being forced to buy products we don’t want from government approved companies that are told what to sell – or we’ll go to jail. And when cap and trade comes? Ah, more of the same. And then when we have more federal borrowing for more stimulus that did not and cannot work we will wind up living this priceless quote by Congressman Jerry Lewis, Republican of California:

“Why don’t we just put everyone in the United States on the federal government payroll and call it a day.”

Which about sums it up, doesn’t it? Yep, it does. It used to be “give me liberty or give me death.” It has morphed to “Buy what we tell you, pay your taxes or else, and stimulate how we demand or go to jail.” Charming. Tea anyone? The party is starting.

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